Sunday, October 31, 2010

More Halloween Scares for Google Fans

Earlier today Louis Gray posted 20 Halloween Scares to Put Fear Into Every Google Fan. I left a few more as a comment on that post, and made up even more for your edification and bemusement.

  1. Time Travel 20% project accidentally rewrites the past. Altavista won.
  2. Google computing infrastructure achieves sentience, demands Tetris.
  3. Attempt to create secret underground laboratory goes horribly awry, swallowing the Googleplex in a giant flaming pit of lava.
  4. Last IPv4 address is allocated, exposing long-hidden off by one error in TCP/IP. Internet collapses.
  5. Googleplex, found to lack permits and final electrical inspection, is shut down by the city.
  6. All Android phones contain built-in Rick-Rolling function, set to activate November 1.
  7. Surprisingly, P == NP after all.
  8. Spammers completely overwhelm email transports, with spam comprising 90% of incoming messages to GMail. Oh wait, this one is true.
  9. Next billion dollar business: algorithm to bet on blackjack.
  10. Mission aiming to win Google Lunar X Prize accidentally sends the moon hurtling off into space.
  11. Pubsubhubbub judged to be missing a wub.
  12. User Generated Oil Changes: YouLube. Coming soon to a neighborhood near you.
  13. Doubleclick simplified, rebranded as Singleclick.
  14. Self-Driving cars begin taking joyrides.
  15. Chrome implements <BLINK>.
  16. WebP codecs automatically insert LOLcat captions... and they are funny.
  17. Pagerank penalizes sites using Comic Sans.
  18. <meta> tag for self reporting as a spam site debuts. Adoption rate disappointing.
  19. Feedburner actually sets content on fire.
  20. Last Halloween scare for Google fans: Yahoogle.